與其防衛，不如發問

當你被批評，或是被拒絕，你的直接反應是立即抗辯回去，保衛你的立場或是項目。但是，如此的行為通常只會激化對手更強烈的反應，或是對你嗤之以鼻，或是對你沉默以對。

下一次，當你面對抗拒時，與其強力辯解為什麼你是對的，或是你提議的項目應該獲得支持，不如先問幾個簡單的問題：

1. 為何你這樣說？
2. 什麼讓你有這樣的結論？

這樣的問題能夠讓對方重新思考他的假設，以及讓你明白他為何這樣想。

這樣發問也可以讓你在對抗中了解更多與更深，讓彼此都能夠更明白對方的目的、立場與底線。

It's better to ask questions than to defend

When you are criticized or rejected, your immediate response is to immediately defend your position or project. However, such behaviour usually only intensifies the opponent's stronger reaction, either by sneering at you or by silencing you.

Next time you face resistance, instead of vigorously defending why you are right or whether your proposed project deserves support, ask a few simple questions:

1. Why do you say that?
2. What makes you come to this conclusion?

Such questions will enable the other person to rethink his hypothesis and make you understand why he thinks so.

Questioning in this way can also let you know more and deeper in the confrontation, so that each other can better understand each other's purpose, position and bottom line.