當你自責懊惱的時候，頂回去，安慰自己

當客戶或同事給你强硬的回饋，你會泰然處之。但是當你自責而懊惱，自我強烈懷疑的時候，你惶惶不安。

你不要忽略，假裝沒有發生過，而應該頂回去。例如：你內心的聲音說：“這件事我處理的糟透了，”你可以回答，“你知道什麼？沒有人每次都能夠做到完美的。”然後，你可以安慰自己，“沒有關係，我下次一定會做好的。”

當你自責的時候，要安慰自己。

這樣做，一開始可能會不自在，甚至彆扭，但你會覺得比較舒坦，可以讓你恢復自信。

When you blame yourself for being upset, respond back and comfort yourself

When a client or colleague gives you a tough time, you can stride it. But when you blame annoyed, self strongly suspected, you are on tenterhooks.

Don't ignore it, and pretend it didn't happen. You should respond back to it. For example: your inner voice said: "This matter I deal badly," you can answer, "You know what? No one can be perfect all the time." then, you can comfort yourself, "It doesn't matter. I'll do better next time."

When you reproach yourself, comfort yourself.

In doing so, you may feel awkward at first, but you'll feel more comfortable and can restore your confidence.

在進行困難對話前，調整好你的心態

如果你正在準備一個你認為是“困難”的談話，你有可能感到緊張、生氣或心煩意亂。為了減少這些負面的情緒，你應該重新組織你的對話思維：你不會向你的老闆說“不”；你被要求提供了一個替代方案；你不知道如何給別人負面的回饋；你必須提供一個項目建設性的意見；等等。

這不是要你對這些困難的對話包上糖衣。誠實地告訴自己談話有多艱難，但盡可能建設性地組織它。你可能會告訴自己：我們可能不得不談論困難的事情，但我們會一起努力，因為我們一直互相尊重。

把重點放在你從談話中可以得到的東西上，假設你有東西要學。以開放的心態進入討論，不管你同事的立場如何，你都更有可能和他一起找到共識。

Adjust your attitude before you have a difficult conversation

If you are preparing a conversation that you consider "difficult", you may feel nervous, angry or upset. To reduce these negative emotions, you should reorganize your dialogue thinking: you won't say no to your boss. You was asked an alternative plan. You don't know how to give negative feedback to others. You must provide a constructive advice or project; etc..

It's not to sugarcoat these difficult conversations. Tell yourself honestly how hard it is to talk, but organize it as constructively as possible. You may tell yourself that we may have to talk about difficult things, but we will work together because we always respect each other.

Focus on what you can get from your conversation, assuming you have something to learn. Go into the discussion with an open mind, and no matter what your colleagues' positions are, you're more likely to find common ground with him.

給同事發信息，不要模糊

有時人們發送模糊的信息是因為他們在趕時間，可能是匆匆地發了一條簡訊，或者在往機場的路上留下了語音信箱。但如果收件人不知道全部情况，一個簡短的消息經常閱讀起來像猜謎語，他會迷惑、恐懼。要知道，如果你給同事發了一封深夜郵件，上面寫著“我們需要交談”，沒有進一步解釋，這可能引發無益的聯想。你的同事可能會想：有問題嗎？我做了什麼？她會責備我嗎？這可能會給你的同事或是你帶來精神壓力，這對你第二天要處理他們的壓力是不健康的。花額外的時間讓你的資訊清楚。在你發送信息之前，問問自己對方如何解釋你的信息或文字。如果你認為這會使他們感到苦惱，那就提供更多相關的內容。

Send messages to your colleagues, don't be vague

Sometimes people send vague message because they are in a hurry, perhaps by sending a message in hurry, or by leaving a voicemail on the way to the airport.

But if the recipient does not know all the whole story and a short message often read like riddles, he will be confused and frightened. You know, if you send a late-night email to a colleague, saying, “We need to talk”, without further explanation, this may lead to unhelpful associations. Your colleague may wonder: is there a problem? What did I do? Will she blame me? This may put stress to your colleague or you, and it’s unhealthy for you to deal with such stress the next day.

Take extra time to make your message clear. Before you send a message, ask yourself how your message will be interpreted. If you think this is going to cause them distress, then provide more relevant content.

不要讓一個優柔寡斷的老闆拖住你

遇到一個不能做出决定的老闆是很麻煩的。沒有方向，你可能不知道你的老闆期望什麼，或者如何最好地推動一個項目向前發展。你可以通過為充當一個老闆的顧問來幫助解決這個問題。幫助你的老闆權衡各種行動的利弊。提出尖銳的問題，提供相關資料，提供個人觀點。如果你的老闆還不確定，試著幫他拿主意，採取行動。

例如，如果你渴望他做出戰略決策，你可以說：“有幾種方法可以解决這個問題。我能要一個彙報我的作法嗎？”

即使這些策略奏效，也要記住一個優柔寡斷的老闆可能仍然是無濟於事的，這對你的聲譽還是是有害的。這個時候，你最好還是在公司內另謀能夠真正支持你的其他老闆。

Don't let an indecisive boss hold you back

It’s hard to meet a boss who can’t make a decision. Without decision, you may not know what your boss expects, or how best to move a project forward.

You can help solve the problem by acting as a consultant to your boss. Help your boss weigh the pros and cons of various actions.

Ask sharp questions, provide relevant information, and provide personal views. If your boss is not sure, try to help him make up his mind and take actions.

For example, if you want him to make a strategic decision, you can say, “there are several ways to solve this problem. Can I have a report on what I'm doing? "

Even if these strategies work, keep in mind that an indecisive boss may still be useless and bad for your reputation. At this point, you’d better find another boss in the company who can really support you.

寫下你的情緒狀態來面對它

你會不會感覺有的時候情緒不對勁，但不確定是為什麼？先察覺你的情緒狀態是應對情緒不穩的第一步。

能夠認知自己情緒狀況的人，通常身心健康狀態會比較好。

當你正經歷一段艱難的時期或者一次大的轉變時，試試這個練習： 用20分鐘的時間，寫下（在紙上或電腦上）你過去一周、一個月或一年的情緒經歷。就隨意的寫。使用短句，如“我學到了，“我覺得，”“可能是因為，”，“我現在認識到，”“我明白。”這些片語幫助你說明你的情緒和觀察的角度，為什麼你感到如此。你不必保存文件。

一旦你寫下來了，你就開始明白你真實的情緒，並且能夠理性去面對它。

Write your emotional state to face it

Do you feel that something is wrong at the moment, but not sure why? First aware of your emotional state is the first step in dealing with emotional instability.

People who are aware of their emotional state are generally better at physical and mental health.

When you are going through a difficult period or a big change, try this exercise: take 20 minutes to write down (on paper or computer) your emotion in past week, a month or a year experience. Write as you like. Use short sentences, such as “I learned，”,“I think,”，“may be because，”，“I now realize,”，“I see.” These phrases to help you explain your feelings and point of view, why do you feel so？You don't have to save the file.
Once you write it down, you begin to understand your real emotions and be able to cope with it rationally.

導師要謹慎吸收學員

一旦你同意擔任學員的導師，就代表你要付出自己的時間。若是你不想浪費時間， 你就要謹慎選擇一位值得你投資去指導的學員。

你必須評估他尋求導師指導的目的和他實際的需求是否相符？他吸收知識的好奇心、學習能力，和組織消化的能力。

這會讓你很好地瞭解他們的思維過程、溝通技巧和興趣程度。如果他們沒有完成工作，不要生氣。相反地，你可以鬆一口氣，你得以在中立地保護你自己，不致于收了一個不合適的學員。

Mentors should be careful to absorb students
Once you agree to be a mentor, it means you have to spend your time. If you don't want to waste your time, be careful to choose a student who deserves your investment to mentor.
Do you have to assess whether his goal of seeking guidance from a mentor is consistent with his actual needs? His curiosity to absorb knowledge, his ability to learn, and his ability to organize and digest.
This will give you a good understanding of their thinking process, communication skills and level of interest. Don't be angry if they don't finish the work. Instead, you can breathe a sigh of relief that you can protect yourself neutrally without taking in an inappropriate student.

你的郵件會表露出你的個人品牌形象

你有沒有考慮過你發的所發的郵件會影響到你的個人品牌形象？

以下的作法可以讓你的郵件傳遞你的正確品牌形象：

1. 只發給目標收件人。記住，每封郵件都會花收件人的閱讀時間。所以，在選擇Reply All和Cc按鍵，要謹慎。
2. 抓住要點。雖然內容很重要，但要記住你要提起讀者注意的只是所有內容其中的一部分，尤其是，你要他做什麼？其次是，提供必要的摘要重點。
3. 簡明客觀而陳述完整。要抓住讀者注意，你的文字要簡明、有客觀事實。而且，不要假設讀者知道你寫作的背景，你的文句要讓讀者知道你郵件的目的與寫作背景。
4. 不可輕浮。避免輕佻或是情緒語言。那無助於增加讀者對你的印象。要客觀、有事實。

Your mail will show your personal brand image

Have you considered your sent message will affect your personal brand image?

The following approach allows you to deliver messages with your right brand image:

1. Send to target recipient. Remember, each email will take the recipient's reading time, so be careful on choosing the Reply All and the Cc button.
2. Catch the point. Although the content is important, remember that what you want to bring reader to notice is only part of all content, especially what you want him to do, and secondly, provide the necessary summary points.
3. Objective and concise statement of integrity. To catch the reader's attention, the text should be concise, you have objective facts. Also, don't assume that readers know your background, your text to let the reader know the purpose and background of writing your mail.
4. Not frivolous（輕浮）. Avoid frivolous or emotional language. It is not conducive to the increase of readers' impression on you. Be objective and with fact.

在你對同事不同意前，考慮他的觀點

當你和同事發生意見分歧，很容易專注於自己的感受而忽略你的對手。但糾結于自己的挫折，於事無補。相對地，設身處地為別人著想。他們想要什麼結果？他們為什麼要這樣做？想想你在和誰打交道？他們只是率性的隨口說說，還是工於心計？

如果你經常和這個人一起工作，你可能已經熟悉他的風格了。但是如果你很少相互交流，你就得做一些多做一些了解。去了解尋找他平常和誰交往？他有何行為習慣？不要到處詰問別人，而只要求他們確認或否認你的觀察意見。

Think about his opinion before you disagree with your colleagues

When you and your colleagues have differences of opinion, it is easy to focus on each own feelings and ignore your opponent. But entangled in own frustration, in vain. In contrast, put yourself for others. What he want? Why he do this? Think you're dealing with? He just talks around, or, he is calculating others?

If you often work with this person, you may already be familiar with his style. But if you seldom communicate with each other, you have to do some more understanding. To know who he usual communicate with in the company? What is his behavior? Don't ask others, but just seek for whether they agree or deny your observation opinions.