不要帶著憤怒情緒對話

當你對一名同事憤怒或是失望時，你可能會企圖罵出口，或發出一封指責的郵件。但是，在你這麼做之前，先問自己：

1. 我想要得到什麼結果？想清楚你的目的，然後回應可以達到你的目的的說法。
2. 我想要溝通什麼？例如，你想要參與到一個項目的任務中，說：“我關切你為何沒有把我列入到會議名單中.”,要比說：“我不能相信你沒有考慮到我！”要好的多。
3. 我應該如何溝通？如果你願意聆聽別人說什麼，他們通常會給予善意的回應。保持好奇，並且多問。問其他人，看看是是否確實理解了他人的觀點。
4. 我應該何時溝通？等到你可以帶著好奇、熱情、願意澄清事實時，對方也可以親切而冷靜時，再做對話。

Don't talk with anger

When you are angry or disappointing to a colleague, you may try to scold the export, or send out a letter of accusation. But before you do it, ask yourself first:

1. What do I want to get? Think about your purpose, and then respond to the idea that you can achieve your purpose.
2. What do I want to communicate? For example, if you want to take part in a project's task, say, "I'm concerned why you didn't put me on the list of meetings." it's more important than saying, "I can't believe you didn't think of me." It's much better.
3.  How should I communicate? If you are willing to listen to what others say, they usually respond in good faith. Be curious and ask more. Ask others to see if they really understand the opinions of others.
4. When should I communicate? When you can be curious, enthusiastic, willing to clarify things in real time, and when the other person can be kindly and calm, do a conversation again.

克服你遲疑談判加薪的心態

經由談判而能夠獲得加薪，對你有長期的好處。但是多數人卻對談判加薪，有遲疑的心態。

以下告訴你如何準備你希望加薪的理由，以及克服你遲疑的心態：

1. 如果因為我要求加薪，而對我不滿，怎麼辦？要避免被拒絕，你要多費心做準備。讓你的老闆或HR人事知道你有心要求加薪。讓他們有時間做準備，並且可以和你私下會晤。
2. 不知道如何說服老闆給我加薪？停止想象你被拒絕而會垂頭喪氣，轉而想象若是你和老闆有良好的對話而會受到激勵。這樣可以避免你在和老闆對話不順而失面子的難堪。你可以說出你對團隊做出的傑出貢獻，以及預備如何做出更佳的績效。你愈是想要躲開對話，就會愈難過。
3. 這不像是我該去做的事。有些人孤傲自負，不屑于去提要求加薪，而寧可苦苦的等待老闆自動給你加薪。你應該丟開這樣的孤傲心態，而將你預備進行的加薪要求，看成是一般的商業談判。即使暫時受到挫折，也還可以繼續進行。

Overcome your hesitation in negotiating a pay rise

 It will be good for you in the long run to be able to get a raise through negotiation. But most people are hesitant about negotiating pay increases. 

Here's how to prepare yourself for a raise and overcome your hesitation: 

1. What if I am dissatisfied with me because I ask for a raise? To avoid rejection, you have to bother preparing. Let your boss or HR personnel know that you are interested in asking for a raise. Give them time to prepare and be able to meet with you in private. 
2. I don't know how to persuade my boss to give me a raise. Stop imagining that you will be discouraged by rejection, and imagine that you will be motivated if you have a good conversation with your boss.This will avoid the embarrassment of losing face when you are having a bad conversation with your boss. You can say what outstanding contributions you have made to your team and how you are prepared to do better. The more you want to avoid dialogue, the more sad you will be. 
3. This is not like what I should do. Some people are so proud that they don't want to ask for a raise, rather than wait for your boss to automatically give you a raise. You should move away from this sense of solitude and regard your proposed pay increase as a general business negotiation. Even if there is a temporary setback, it can continue.

要感到愉悅，記住你要感謝的

沒有什麼比以正面態度來經常表達感謝能夠讓你感到愉快了。這樣的做法能夠降低你的焦慮感，減少患得患失的憂慮，以及改善你的睡眠品質。

但是，你也不能整天只會將“真感謝你”的話掛在嘴上。將你想要感謝的人或事記下來。在每天一早先想想你今天想要感謝誰，或是在下班時回顧一下今天受到了誰的幫助。如此做，可以增進你的愉快心情。

Be happy and remember what you want to thank

No more than a positive expression of thanks can make you feel happy. This approach can reduce your anxiety, reduce anxiety and worry about personal gains and losses, improve your sleep quality.

However, you can't spend all day will only "thank you" if say it. Will you want to thank the people or things down. Think about who you want to thank today, or look back to the help of today. Doing so can improve your pleasurable mood.

控制會令你焦躁的念頭

你被卡在車陣中。你即將錯過飛機航班。你的計劃沒有被有效執行。你即將失去重要的客戶。你不確定會得到升級，或是會遭到冷凍。你真希望能夠一口氣吹走這些會令你焦躁的念頭。

好消息是，你確實有方法控制這些會令你焦躁的念頭。

先將這些會令你焦躁的事情列出來、寫下來。分析每個項目，想想如何可以去解決。將這些會令你厭煩的事設法去處理掉。拖延只會讓你更焦躁。

沒有整理好會令你焦躁的事項，包含你的心態，只會讓你有更大的壓迫感。

Control your impatience

You are stuck in a traffic jam. You are going to miss the flight. Your plan has not been effectively implemented. You are going to lose important customers. You are not sure that you will be upgraded, or you will be frozen. You really want to be able to blow away these thoughts that will make you impatient.

The good news is that you do have a way to control the idea that will make you impatient.

List and write down these things that will make you impatient. Analyze each project and think about how to solve it. Try to deal with things that will annoy you. Procrastination only makes you more impatient.

It will only allow you to have a greater sense of oppression if you don't reorganize your anxiety, including your mind.

明智的運用你的精力

我們大多數人都是全力在工作，而沒有保留多餘的精力。所以，我們必須策略性的安排我們的精力在對我們最重要的事情上。

請用下列的方法開始做：

1. 設定工作時間。提醒自己，工作最多每隔90分鐘，必須休息一會兒。
2. 知道什麼事對自己是重要的。弄清楚那些事對自己是重要的，而且客語讓自己愉快。
3. 明智的運用精力。一旦知道自己最關切什麼，在工作日程上就要盡可能安排出時間來做。
4. 知道哪些不該花精力。知道該做些什麼后，你也會察覺哪些事不值得你費力去做。
5. 不要多想。專注在對你重要的事，其餘和你不怎麼相關的，不需要關切。

Use your energy wisely

Most of us are working hard without retaining the extra energy. So we have to strategically arrange our energy to be the most important thing to us.

Please start with the following methods:

1. Set the working time. Remind yourself that you have to work at most every 90 minutes and have to rest for a while.
2. Know what is important to yourself. Make sure that those things are important to yourself, and the guest language makes yourself happy.
3. Use the energy wisely. Once you know what you are most concerned about, you should do as much time as possible on the work schedule.
4.  Know what shouldn't be spent. When you know what to do, you will also be aware of what is not worth your effort.
5. Don't think much of it. Focus on what is important to you, the rest of you are not related to you, and there is no need to be concerned.

在爭論時，考慮對方的觀點

通常在和人爭論時，你不會先考慮對方的觀點。但是，這應該是爭論開始時，最優先必須要做的。

如果你能夠先考慮對方的立場、專業、觀點與感受，你就可以專注在爭論的內容上，而非你的面子、情緒。

展現你有注意到他的觀點，例如這樣說；“我想這是我們必須好好談的重要事情。”，或是，“我想你很想要主張你的對的，我尊重。”你也可以複述對方的主張，例如：“你的主張是…”

這些技巧可以降低對方的抗拒態度，而讓雙方比較能夠平等的達成有共識的解決方案。

In an argument, consider the other person's point of view

Usually when you argue with people, you don't think about the other person's point of view first. But this should be the first priority when the debate begins.

If you can first consider each other's position, profession, point of view and feelings, you can concentrate on the content of the argument, not your face and emotions.

Show that you have noticed his point of view, for example, to say, "I think that's the important thing we have to talk about."." Or, "I think you want to claim that you're right, I respect.". You can also retell the other person's opinions, such as: "what's your opinion?..."

These skills can reduce opposition, and allow both sides to reach a consensus on equal solutions.

以維護好你的時間來提高生產力

如果你想要能夠完成更多，你必須掌握你的時間的主導權。

最能夠讓我們能夠滿意的是做自己啟動的項目。對於那些對自己不重要的，或是非自己有興趣的，或是對自己時間不經濟的工作，設法授權外包給別人做。

對於不是自己優先的項目，斷然拒絕並且堅決關注在那些只有自己才能完成的工作上。

認知自己的體能限度，做充足的睡眠與運動。注意每工作90分鐘，就要做短暫的休息。

最高效的工作者看待休息是對能夠提高生產力的必要投資。

To maintain your time to improve productivity

If you want to be able to do more, you have to master the dominance of your time.

The best thing that can satisfy us is to do the project that you start. Try to empower to outsource to others who are not important to themselves, or are not interested in themselves, or are uneconomical for their own time.

For projects that are not their own priority, they refuse and pay attention to the work that can only be done by themselves.

Recognize the limits of your body and do plenty of sleep and exercise. Pay attention to a short break for every 90 minutes of work.

The most efficient workers look at rest as a necessary investment to improve productivity.

如果你的老闆要你做違規的事，怎麼辦？

如果你的老闆要你做一些不道德，或是違反工作守則，或是很可能是違法的事，你怎麼辦？

首先，你還是要設法先了解這是否是符合他的興趣或是利益？也許他只是沒有察覺這是違反規則的要求。然後，你設法讓他明白這將要付出何種代價，并建議他最好不要這樣做。這樣也可以讓他知道你感到不安，而讓他自己撤回對你的要求。

如果這樣做還不能打消他的主意，那麼你最好就直接拒絕。

如果這樣還行不通，那麼就要設法告知你的老闆的老闆，或是公司監察人，或是人事部門。這樣能夠讓你集結幾個關切這件事的夥伴，一起向你的老闆表達大家的顧慮。

在最惡劣的情況下，你必須考慮採取直接的司法行動，或是向公司外界曝光這件事。

What if your boss wants you to do something illegal? 

What if your boss asks you to do something that is immoral, violates a code of work, or is likely to be illegal? 

First of all, you still have to try to find out first whether it is in his interest or interest? Maybe he just didn't realize it was a violation of the rules. Then you try to get him to know what it's going to cost and advise him not to. It will also let him know that you are upset and let him withdraw his demands on you. 

If that doesn't stop him, you'd better just say no. 

If this doesn't work, try to tell your boss's boss, or the company's supervisor, or the personnel department. This will allow you to bring together a few partners who are concerned about this and share their concerns with your boss. 

In the worst cases, you have to consider taking direct judicial action or exposing it to the outside world of the company.