2016年11月28日 星期一

如果你要成功,千萬不要說出這些外交辭令

要成為一個在職場與事業上成功,很大成分是心智上的努力。
你可以是最有天分的人才,在你的產業倍受尊敬,但是如果你對自己沒有自信,過於直率的誠實,你將會很艱難地發展事業,你的失敗將是難以避免。
從你每天進入辦公室,到建立你和夥伴之間的關係,你每天的話語,將會產生長期的影響。
無論你是否有意的,如果你所說的話帶有不確定、疑慮,或是你不肯定你自己說的內容,你將會失去他人的信任。
你所說的話,不僅會影響自己的心智,而且和你對話的人會從你的話語和肢體語言中讀出你的缺乏自信。
你要成功,就要避免說出以下這些帶有不確定性的外交辭令:
  1. 可能吧(Might)。這是最糟糕的用詞。在你和他人對話時,先想清楚你是否確實知道事實與可行性。如果肯定,就用明確的肯定詞。如果不肯定,就直接說必須查明后再回覆。如果你說“可能吧”,那麼對方就可能另尋他人,或是懷疑你是否會給予承諾,或懷疑你缺乏能力。如果你說“可能吧”,會衍生出許多有滋擾的想象。
  2. 通常情況下(Usually)。若是使用“通常情況下”這個語詞,會顯示出在某些情況下的不確定。它帶有暗示對方不要在多數情況下會有結果的期待。如果你也確實不確定,可以提議做出假設與進行必要的查證。
  3. 應該(Should)。這個用詞同樣帶有不確定意味,顯示你缺乏信心,而且你只是帶著期望而缺乏準備,你可能在作業程序帶有瑕疵。
  4. 不會(Won’t be)。這是最直接表現出你的防禦抗拒態度,帶有你拒絕參與的意圖。
  5. 有可能(Likely)。若是在商業或工作場合上,你說“可能吧”,等於什麼都沒有說,只是一個猜測而已,不僅顯示你對結果缺乏信心,而且會披露出你缺乏足夠的知識。
  6. 要是(If Only)。你只是在做夢!你對在發展的工作缺乏控制。你只是一名機會主義者。
  7. 確實如此(Really)。這個用詞詞語帶輕率。你只是旁觀者,做了些附和,並沒有實際參與貢獻。你可以選擇某些重要內容,說明其實際價值。
以上用詞,都會讓人們對你發生不信任的感覺,而讓你的工作或事業失敗。當然,若是你用來當外交辭令,那麼你必須清楚知道你要達到的目的,並且有策略的設計你的對話情境。

If you want to succeed, do not say these diplomatic words
If you want to succeed, begin to avoid using these uncertainty diplomatic words.
To make a success career, a great component is a mental effort.
You can be the most talented person and highly respected in your industry, but if you don't have confidence in yourself and be too frank and honest, you will be very difficult to develop your career, and your failure will be unavoidable.
From every day you enter the office to build a relationship between you and your partners, your daily words will have a long-term impact.
Whether you want to or not, if you say something with uncertainty or doubt, or if you are not sure what you say, you will lose the trust of others.
What you say will not only affect your mind, but the people who speak to you will read out your lack of confidence in your words and body language.
If you want to succeed, you should avoid saying the following words of uncertainty:
  1. Maybe. (Might). This is the worst word. Dialogue in you and others, first want to know whether you really know the truth and feasibility. If yes, with a clear affirmation. If not sure, just say it must find out and then reply. If you say "maybe". Then the other may find someone else, or wonder if you make promises, you doubt or lack of ability. If you say "maybe", will derive a lot of nuisance imagination.
  2. Normally. (Usually). If you use "normally" this word, will show the uncertainty in some cases. It has suggested that in most cases you don't have the look. If you are unsure yourself, you may propose assumptions and necessary verification.
  3. It should be (Should). This word is also uncertain, showing you lack of confidence, and you just have expectations and lack of preparation. You may have flaws in the operation process.
  4. No. (Won 't be). This is the most direct expression of your defensive resistance, with the intention of refusing to participate.
  5. Possible (Likely). If you say "may be" on business or work occasions, it means nothing. It is just a guess. It not only shows your lack of confidence in the result, but also reveals that you lack enough knowledge.
  6. If (If Only). You are just dreaming! You are not in control of the work in development. You are just an opportunist.
  7. It is true (Really). This wording phrase is imprudent. You are just a spectator, making some echoes, and not actually participating in the contribution. You can choose some important contents to illustrate its actual value.
The above words will make people feel untrusting about you and let your work or career fail. Of course, if you are used as diplomatic language, you must be clear about what you want to achieve, and strategically design your dialogue.

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