要避免緊張煎熬，評估一下你如何分配時間

無情的壓力很容易導致緊張煎熬。但是不需要如此。你可以重新評估你的時間分配，安排時間給你多照顧自己。

你可以花些時間看看你下週要如何安排你的工作與生活。你可以用一張紙，或是用電腦或手機上的日曆軟體工具。在每項工作安排上，記下你預備如何做，你會和誰一起完成，這個工作項目的成果與價值是如何，做好后你的感覺會如何？

尤其是你自己的感受。你會感覺不愉快還是會愉快？你的承受底線是如何的？你預備如何防範讓你不愉快。

保留出時間讓你做可以讓你有正能量的工作，或是可以讓你輕鬆休息，例如你可以去散步運動，或是與朋友愉快聊天。

To avoid tension, evaluate how you allocate your time

Relentless stress can easily lead to tension. But it doesn't have to be. You can reassess your time allocation and schedule time to take care of yourself.

You can take some time to see how you will plan your work and life next week. You can use a piece of paper, or a calendar software tool on a computer or a mobile phone. In every work arrangement, write down how you are going to do it, and who will you do with it. What is the result and value of this project? How do you feel after doing it well?

Especially your own feelings. Do you feel unhappy or happy? What is your bottom line? How do you prepare to guard you against making you unhappy?

Keep time to let you do the work that allows you to have positive energy or allow you to relax easily, such as taking a walk or chatting with friend.

不要讓瀕臨崩潰的同事更崩潰

當我們看到一名同事已經處於心理承受極限，我們會想要給他幫助。但是，即使我們動機良善，我們卻經常將事情搞的更惡化。

這表示，我們可能在錯誤的時間，說錯了話。

這個時候，你要很謹慎使用你的語言，要知道哪些話不能說。你要避免談你自己以及過去你處理類似情緒的經驗。當有人面臨他的極限是，他不會想聽你的經歷，他這個時候一樣只關切著自己。

這個時候，你不要說：“別擔心。”，“沒事。”，“你太過慮了。”，或是，“事情會過去的。”

相對的，你應該說：“你可以應付過去的。”提供一個可以度過困難的例子。然後問他：“這對你有幫助嗎？”如果他的回答是：“沒事。”，或是“我不知道。”你就坐下來，安靜一會兒，等他自己安靜想想，他會自己找出一些想法。

目的不是幫他療愈他的緊張情緒，而是讓他降低緊張壓力。

Don't let a colleague on the verge of collapse break down more

When we see a colleague already in a psychological limit, we want to help him. But even if our motives are good, we often make things worse.

It means that we may be wrong at the wrong time.

At this time, you should use your language carefully and know which words can't be said. You should avoid talking about yourself and your experience in dealing with similar emotions in the past. When someone faces his limit, he doesn't want to listen to your experience, and he is only concerned about himself at this time.

At this time, you don't say, "Don't worry." "It's all right." "You are too overdone." Or, "Things will go."

In contrast, you should say, "You can deal with the past." Provide an example of how difficult it can be. Then ask him, "Is it helpful for you?" If his answer is, "Nothing." Or, "I don't know." Just sit down, be quiet for a while, and wait for his own quiet thinking, he will find out some ideas.

The goal was not to help him heal his tension, but to reduce his stress.

計劃你退休后的職業生活

如果你希望在退休后還有些餘裕來繼續工作，你必須做一些計劃。你應該問自己以下四個問題：

1. 我需要賺多少錢？如果你確實需要一些錢，這必須優先于其他的決策考慮。
2. 我在哪裡工作可以平衡工作與生活？如果你希望一面工作，一面可以養花怡情養性或有些讀書生活，有些退休樂趣，你就必須考慮在那個工作地點，可以做到如此，包含可以在家上網。
3. 我想要做多少改變？如果你只是想要減輕目前的工作負擔，你可以請求你的老闆將你的工作轉成顧問性質。要做更大的改變需要做更多的準備。
4. 我如何開始為我以後的工作開始練習？開始承接一些小的項目，一直到你可以獲得一份穩定的收入。

Plan your career life after retirement

If you want to have some spare time to continue your work after retirement, you must make some plans. You should ask yourself the following four questions:

1. How much money do I need to make? If you do need some money, it must take precedence over other decision considerations.
2. Where can I work to balance work and life? If you want to some extra work while you are still on a job, you can spend time at home, or have some reading, some retirement fun, you have to consider where you can do it, including access to the Internet at home.
3. How much change do I want to make? If you just want to reduce the current job burden, you can ask your boss to turn your job into a consultancy. Much more preparation is needed to make a bigger change.
4. How do I begin to practice for my future work? Start a few small projects until you get a steady income.

用完成期限來提高你的生產力與降低壓力

設定完成期限通常會讓人感覺受到拘束，但是不見得如此，可以用不同眼光看待。

你可以這樣想：完工期限是一種安排優先次序的工具，它可以告訴你哪些是重要而必須專注的事項。它可以讓你誠實的評估你的工作承受能量。如果你有某個任務必須在週五完成，而這會消耗掉你所有的時間來達成，那麼你就比較容易去拒絕其他的承諾。

而且當你知道有機會及時完工，你就會帶著警惕的心理，一步步的去做，以便能夠達成目標。

你只要確保你設定完工期限的項目是確實重要的，保留一點時間來預備應付應變需要，並且通知利害相關人，可能會有的變數，避免雙方應變不及。

做好這樣的策略，就可以有機會提高你的生產力，也可以降低你的壓力。

Use the deadline to improve your productivity and reduce stress

Setting the deadline is usually makes people feel constrained, but it's not necessary, and you can be viewed differently.

Think of it this way: Deadline are a sort of prioritization tool that tell you what’s important and must be focused on. It can give you an honest assessment of your work's energy. If you have a task that must be completed on Friday, and it will consume all of your time to achieve it, then you are more likely to reject other commitments.

And when you know that you have a chance to finish it in time, you will take a vigilant mind and do it step by step so that you can achieve your goals.

You just make sure you set the deadline of the project is really important, leave a little time to prepare to deal with the strain, and notify the person may be closely connected, variable, avoid both sides not strain.

With such a strategy, you can have an opportunity to improve your productivity and reduce your stress.

當對話變得激烈時，該如何應對？

當一場對話開始轉成負面，對話開始有爭吵味道，你最好有個想法，應該如何控制對話？請考慮以下作法：

1. 重塑對話。用不同的眼光看待對話。如果有人說：“我不想維持爭吵。”你可以如此看待這場對話，：“這只是爭論，當然不是爭吵。”
2. 轉化語言。與其使用攻擊性語言，換一種說法。如果有人說你在會議中太過強勢，你可以回答：“我是熱情的。”如果有人說你頑固，你可以說：“當有些事對於促進成功是很重要時，我會很堅定的。”
3. 讓雙方都考慮對方立場。在對話出現可能會轉趨激烈時，提醒彼此都應該考慮到對方的立場，雙方的目的，以及雙方的底線。
4. 提醒合作經驗。如果你和對話方曾經有過良好的關係，你可以提醒他：“我們曾經有過很好的合作工作經驗，這不應該有所改變。”

What to do when conversation get intense?

When a conversation begins to turn negative, and a conversation begins to smell like an argument, you’d better have an idea. How do you control the conversation? Please consider the following approach:

1. Reshape the dialogue. Look at the dialogue in a different way. If someone says, "I don't want to keep arguing." You can look at this conversation, "It's just an argument, not a quarrel, of course."
2. Transform the language. Instead of using offensive language, put it another way. If someone says to you are too strong in the meeting, you can answer: "I am enthusiastic." If someone says you are stubborn, you can say, "When something is important to success, I will be firm."
3. Let both sides consider each other's position. When the dialogue becomes intense, remind each other to take into account each other's position, their goals, and the bottom line of each side
4. Reminding the experience of cooperation. If you have had a good relationship with the dialogues, you can remind him: "We have had very good cooperation experience, which should not be changed."

最好的領導知道如何真正傾聽

即使是在當今可以做即時的全球連線通話的時代，最有效的溝通行為仍然是做好傾聽。但是，熟練傾聽技巧還是很大的挑戰。你如何建立起自己的傾聽能力？

你可以讓自己在一天工作中留下一些時間來回想你上次與人的對話，想想你下次會如何做對話？

當有同事或是你的屬下來請示你的意見，你要確保你了解狀況。在回答問題前，先問幾個問題，弄清楚他需要什麼？並且要認真傾聽。

能夠全神貫注的傾聽，是有效領導的首要能力。

The best leader knows how to really listen

Even in today's era of instant global connection, the most effective communication is still listening. But listening skills are still great challenges. How do you build your listening ability?

You can leave some time in your day's work to think about your last conversation with people, and think about how you will do the next conversation.

When a colleague or your subordinate asks for your advice, make sure that you understand the situation. Before answering the questions, ask a few questions and find out what he needs. And listen carefully.

Being able to listen attentively is the primary ability of effective leadership.

仿效別人并不完全可恥

我們經常會被人認為是冒牌貨，在抄襲別人，被認為並不合格來負責被指定的工作。而感到羞恥。但是，即使是CEO也偶爾會去仿效別人，他也會很難擺脫這樣的困難。

以後，如果你面臨別人認為你在抄襲別人而感到難堪，請試著這麼處理：

1. 認知作為新手的好處。每個人都不會是全能的，總會有需要學習的。當你對某個領域不夠熟悉，你可以作為新手來提問，或是提出別人沒有想過的問題。你可以用別的方法來解決問題，或是試著以別人的方法來做，從中體會困難，獲得經驗。
2. 抱著學習的心態。多關注在學習，而非在意你的表現成果。不要擔心會犯錯。要知道你的限制與錯誤，可以幫助你成長。
3. 知道你不是唯一這麼做的人。認知別人若是在你的處境，也會有同樣的感覺。在做出仿效行為時，可以對自己寬心一些。

Intimating others is not a complete shame

We are often regarded as counterfeit goods, copying others and being considered unqualified to be responsible for assigned work. And feel ashamed. However, even if CEO occasionally imitated others, it would be difficult for him to get rid of such difficulties.

Later, if you are faced with the embarrassment of someone who thinks you are copying someone, try this:

1. The benefits of novice. Everyone is not almighty, and there is always a need to learn. When you are not familiar with a particular field, you can ask questions as a novice or ask questions that others have not thought about. You can use other ways to solve the problem, or try to do it in other people's way, to experience difficulties and to gain experience.
2. Take the attitude of learning. Pay more attention to learning than your performance. Don't worry about making mistakes. Knowing your limitations and mistakes can help you grow.
3. Know that you are not the only person to do this. Knowing that someone else is in your situation will feel the same way. You can be more comfortable with yourself when you act in intimate.

扭轉壞印象

讓人有了壞印象，通常是很難扭轉的。但是，要改變別人如何看待你，不是不可能的。請試試以下的做法：

1. 讓人驚訝。例如，如果人們認為你從來是不發言說話的，那麼，讓自己在一次會議中率先發言，說出你的主張評論，讓人矚目。
2. 用力改變。經常而反復的以你的表現來證明別人過去對你的壞印象是錯誤的。
3. 和人接近。如果你曾經讓別人誤會過，不要迴避。和他多接近，讓他認識你究竟是怎樣的人。、靜待雲淡風輕。有的時候，別人對你的壞印象的成因，和你一點關係都沒有。如果你能夠保持耐心，作出讓人讚揚的表現，人們逐漸就會改變對你的看法。

Reverse bad impression

It is often difficult to reverse a bad impression. But it is not impossible to change how others think of you. Try the following:

1. Make a surprise. For example, if people think you never speak, then let yourself take the lead in speaking at a meeting, giving your comments and comments.
2. Force yourself to change. Often and repeatedly use your performance to prove that other people's bad impression of you in the past is wrong.
3. Get close to people. If you have been misunderstood by others, don't avoid it. Get closer to him and let him know what you are.
4. Wait for clear. Sometimes, the cause of others’ bad impression of you has nothing to do with you. If you can patient and perform admirably, people will gradually change their view of you.