不需要充當是和氣先生

在多數的辦公場合裡，人們總是盡可能當個和氣先生，避免與人發生衝突。但是，這樣刻意地避開不同意見的對話，對爭議話題保持沉默，會創造出許多複雜性與不必要的焦慮。

你可以嘗試以下的方法來面對可能的衝突場面，轉換成建設性的對話：

1. 自我檢討。問問自己，是否經常控制不住自己多嘴的舌頭，在不恰當的場合說了不適宜的話？你自己能控制，避免發生可能的衝突嗎？
2. 獲得回饋。請教一下身邊可信任的朋友，他們是否察覺到你可能正在陷入一場潛在的衝突情境中。他們可能可以看出有些你自己不是那麼可以清晰察覺的某些衝突症狀。
3. 試試看。你不需要一夜之間就改變你自己。你還是可以拒絕別人，或是在一個會議場合中當場說出你的意見，然後，看看別人的反應是如何的。也許，你的對事不對人，直率的態度，反而顯示出了你的真誠。相對的，如果多數人對你有比較一致的不認同或其他評論，你也能夠較快知道該如何調整自己了。

No need to act as Mr. Harmony

In most office settings, people are always as kind as possible to avoid conflicts with others. However, such deliberate avoidance of the dialogue of different opinions and silence on controversial topics will create a lot of complexity and unnecessary anxiety.

You can try the following ways to face possible conflict situations and turn them into constructive dialogue:

1. Self-review. Ask yourself if you often can't control your mouthful and say inappropriate words on inappropriate occasions. Can you control yourself and avoid possible conflicts?
2. Get feedback. Ask your trusted friends if they perceive you may be in a potential conflict situation. They may be able to see some conflicting symptoms that you are not so clearly aware of.
3. Try it. You don't need to change yourself overnight. You can still reject others, or say your opinion on the spot in a meeting, and then see how others react. Perhaps, you are not right about people, straightforward attitude, but show your sincerity. By contrast, if most people disagree with you or comment on you more consistently, you can quickly learn how to adjust yourself.