在艱難的對話中，修改你的“主張/批評”為“觀點”

當你和同事討論一個你一直在發生的衝突時，你可能會被引誘到你的事件中，假設你的對手應該完全按照你的主張去看事情。但這種做法不太可能成功。相反地，引導他對待你的“主張/批評”為你的“觀點”.

用“我”而不是“你”開始句子，說“我很惱火，這個項目落後了六個月”，而不是“你錯過了我們設定的每一個期限。”

即使你對另一個人有權的責備，責備或盤問他們也會使談話停止。記住，你幾乎肯定也要分攤部分責任。

承認你在衝突中的角色將為雙方樹立一種責任感，可以讓對方更容易承認自己的錯誤。

In difficult dialogues, revise your "advocating / criticism" as "point of view"

When you talk to your colleagues about a conflict you have been doing, you may be tempted into your event, assuming that your opponent should see things completely according to your opinion. But this is unlikely to be successful. Instead, guide him to your "opinion / criticism" as your "opinion".

Start sentences with “I,” not “you.” Say “I’m annoyed that this project is six months behind schedule,” rather than “You’ve missed every deadline we’ve set.”

Even if you have valid criticisms of the other person, blaming or cornering them will shut down the conversation. And remember, you’re almost certainly contributing to the dynamic as well.

Acknowledging your role in the conflict will set a tone of accountability for both of you, making your counterpart more likely to own up to their missteps as well.